Anxiety of Coming Out
Varnesvari Rilde | 06, Sep 2022

Anxiety of Coming Out
For years I had hidden,
For months I had waited,
For weeks I had decided,
Mere moments is all that remained.
Today is the day – I told myself,
Now is the time – I explained to self,
It will be all right – I assured myself.
Neither was true, nor was it false,
The one truth was that it would change it all.
I entered the room,
I sat in the chair.
“M...M...Mom”, I stuttered.
I had something to tell.
I opened my mouth to say the words.
I was struck by a thought which was worse.
My mouth won’t move,
My heart-beat fast,
I heard the silence,
So I revealed it all.
“I’m queer” I said.
And closed my eyes.
I didn’t wish to see,
Her reaction this time.